Europe in December

I took a life changing trip to England and France with a new friend, and gained more than just good memories.

Hi, I’m Reid! I write about my life experiences and how we can all live in brave new ways. Dare You is an entirely reader-supported publication. To receive weekly posts and support my work, please consider becoming a free or paid subscriber.

---

It’s 8pm on a gorgeous rainy evening in Paris. I sit at a cafe, sipping a glass of wine and writing in my new journal I purchased earlier this morning at the Pompidou Museum. Just as I had imagined it would be on my last day in France. Even the rain has a charming effect on the city that I’ll miss more than watching dogs roam off leash but not as much as the croissants that I’ve consumed every day, sometimes twice. I feel like a new woman. More at ease. Lighter. Happier honestly. It makes me wonder why I didn’t take this trip sooner, but perhaps it was meant to happen just as it did, at exactly this time.

A theme in my twenties had been, “I’ll do this when…” When X occurs, THEN and only then will I have permission to experience Y. The crooked rule of all these things that had to happen before I was allowed to properly travel abroad caused me to feel confined to my own circumstances. But when the decision to take this trip came about, it came without a flinch. It was easy. It was “yes, I think I’ll do just that.” Out of character for who I used to be, but possibly just on brand for the person I have become. Nothing about planning this trip felt stressful; It was all just straight up fun and exciting.

My friend Jodi, whom I have only known since May of this year, has been my travel companion. The experience of making plans with someone only to have one party bail out at some point along the way is pretty common, especially with trips like this. But Jodi has followed through every step of the way, even when we were faced with contemplating the so called “bed bug outbreak” in France a few months ago and the over all unrest in the world today. But we kept our vision and made it happen.

London, Strasbourg, Lyon, Paris

Some might say it’s odd and possibly unadvisable to travel abroad with someone who is a new friend that you don’t known entirely well just yet, but for some reason I just knew Jodi and I would be fine. And we were more than fine. In fact, we make a great team and travel fantastically together! We share many of the same interests and both love to eat and drink wine and get a bit rowdy. This trip was transformative for both of us, and I feel so lucky to have grown closer.

Jodi left for the states yesterday, leaving me with a day in Paris to myself, and it has been nothing but magical. I have found myself in conversations with strangers that have been so kind and intriguing. An older French couple sitting next to me at a cafe earlier today were so charming, and I felt special when the woman engaged in conversation with me. We had a lovely thirty minute conversation about everything from how to make a marriage last a long time (I took notes) to her time as a yoga teacher and how she wants to go to Austin,Texas, and spend time with her niece who just moved there for a man she only recently met. I found myself in a conversation with a solo traveler from Israel over a crepe, and the manager of the restaurant was energetically asking a million questions about what it’s like to live in America. Currently, I’m in an on-and-off conversation with my very kind server named Jamal at the cafe I’m sitting at right now. Jamal is from Bangladesh and has lived in Paris for 5 years but would like to move to London some time next year where his sister lives… preferably after the Paris Olympics.

Many common threads amongst perfect strangers, the most apparent being that it seems everyone I encountered is longing to experience what it’s like to explore new culture or wanting to change their geographical circumstances in some way. For so long, I felt like an outlier because I was not well traveled. I literally yearned for travel and felt like I was stunted in some way for having not been out of the country since I was twelve years old. It puts me at ease to know I’m not the only one who felt that way and even more at ease to know that is no longer my story. Doesn’t it feel nice to change your story about yourself?

Jodi and I in Paris.

Our trip has consisted of two countries, England and France. We began in London, then hopped over to Paris, then Strasbourg where we got to experience the biggest Christmas Market in France, then Lyon where we were stunned by the “Festival of Lights” which just so happened to be taking place the weekend we had booked our stay there. If you haven’t heard of The Festival of Lights, look it up; it’s insanely cool! Then we came back to Paris the other day to end our trip in probably my favorite city out of the bunch.

As Jodi and I walked the streets of Paris and London, we’d talk about what our lives would be like if we lived there and how we could make it happen if we wanted to. Life is slowly teaching me that if you desire to have an experience, like an extended stay in another country or even a possible move, it truly is possible to create the circumstances that would provide that opportunity. And it doesn’t have to be that expensive. Shortly before this trip, my partner and I were watching Shark Tank when he turned to me and said, “Reidy, I’m starting to think that there is another country that I’d be better suited in. Like, the culture might provide a better way of life.” I was elated to hear him say that and of course reacted in my usual overly enthusiastic way when he says something that resonates with my heart but I have yet to express. “Oh my gosh, me too!! Where should we move?!” Jumping the gun a bit. But it’s still fun to dream up new possibilities for ourselves and then take the elements of that vision and apply them to our lives right here, right now.

Jodi and I in London and Paris.

I’m applying a more relaxed approach to my life after this trip. “Zero stress” Jodi and I would say when we’d talk about coming back to America and moving about our lives as new women. “Leisure” became our theme of the trip, and I’d like to be in a leisurely pace of life moving forward, especially when things get hectic and it’s easy to wig myself out.

Like self-taped auditions, for instance! Ever since the pandemic, all auditions have been self-taped at home rather than in person like they were pre 2020. I used to get so stressed the second I got an audition… usually with a ton of pages to memorize in a super short amount of time that felt impossible, plus the want to do a good job, and also GET the job. Auditions have been slim to none this year with the the writers and actors’ strikes, and I was sure I wouldn’t receive any while I was away on this trip. But lo and behold, towards the tail end of our trip I not only got one, but two auditions in a row for really great projects. From the moment I got the auditions, to preparing, through taping them with Jodi who was so kind to help me, I had this feeling of calm and quiet confidence I had truly never felt before. Upon reflection, I am shocked! If I had gotten two auditions on a trip abroad a year ago, I would have been so stressed out trying to fit it in with all of the other things we had planned. But this time, I just felt in the pocket. It was actually really enjoyable, as it should be.

While sitting here, I have compiled a list of all the things the French do differently. I’m sure I’ll share this list with you in the coming weeks, but one of the big things that stood out to me, which I wrote down was, “The French don’t live to work; they work to live.” A concept I’ll at least attempt to integrate, but I’m lucky that my profession is one I love to do and brings me so much joy…much to think about.

Jessica Rose Williams

Substack,

The Simple Letter

, was a huge source of inspiration for this trip. She is originally from England and documents her lifestyle and adventures while living in Paris. Jessica so honestly and vulnerably shares her experience of moving to Paris and thriving there while living her minimalist lifestyle. It’s definitely worth the read if you are interested in embracing a more Parisian lifestyle, planning a trip there, or just want to read a blog that is truthful and relatable no matter where you reside.

Jamal brought me a free shot of homemade elderberry liquor his manager made for a new cocktail. I haven’t had a single drop of liquor since I arrived in Europe, but I appreciate the gesture. Hold on…. Wow, this is really good. I should probably make my way back to the hotel and get my shit together for the early morning flight tomorrow.

God, I’ll miss this.

I try to leave Jamal a 10 Euro bill for a tip, even though they don’t tip in France. “No, no, no.” he said. “Pleeeeease, you’ve been so nice. I’m leaving tomorrow, what am I going to do with 10 Euro anyway?” I replied. And then he said, “If I take the 10 Euro, you won’t remember me. If I don’t take it, you will remember me and this conversation.” I was so deeply moved by that. Back when I was waiting tables, I wouldn’t hesitate to take the cash. But I understood what he meant. So I obliged. I won’t forget him either.

-Reid