The Case for Being Unhinged
Why No One Is Attracted to Perfection Anymore
Hi, I’m Reid! I write about my life experiences and how we can all live in brave new ways. Dare You is a reader-supported publication. To receive weekly posts and support my work, please consider becoming a free or paid subscriber. 💗
My new year’s resolution this year is to be more unhinged.
Not in a crazy, go-off-the rails, “she’s lost her mind” type of way. To me, becoming more unhinged has a whole other meaning, and it’s one that has the ability to set you free.
MY DEFINITION OF UNHINGED: Becoming unhinged means detaching from the idea of perfection we all thought we had to abide by. It means deviating from our well made plans and going a more risky, adventurous route. It’s all about showing up as your full, authentic self and ditching the need to be palatable, polished, or universally approved of. It’s trusting your instincts over the rules, choosing curiosity over control, and letting yourself be seen exactly as you are… messy, bold, evolving.
Being unhinged is giving yourself permission to change your mind, take up space, say the thing, wear the outfit, make the move, and stop waiting for the “right” time or the green light from anyone else. It’s living from truth instead of fear, and realizing that the life you want is on the other side of loosening your grip.
Whew! Glad I got all that out. Doesn’t that sound nice?
I am someone who LOVES to make plans. At the beginning of every year, I get so excited to sit down and write out all my goals for the coming year and make a plan for how I’m going to achieve them. But I’ve noticed over the years that the only times I’ve actually manifested what I want were when I allowed myself to deviate from the plan. Only when I surrendered and just went with the flow more and trusted my gut in the moment, rather than trying to make the “right” decision… that’s when things came through.
I am challenging you to get a little radical this year. Becoming unhinged begins with your commitment to being unpredictable. Lean into the element of surprise in your life. Let your plans get messy. Be okay with your life not going according to plan, and then STILL showing up from that space.
When I say become unhinged, I don’t mean reckless.
I mean: Saying the thing you’ve been scared to say. Posting the video you keep overthinking and letting it be a little all over the place. Going after the opportunity before you feel ready. Letting people misunderstand you. Choosing growth over approval.
Being unhinged is deciding that your potential matters more than being liked.
In order to be unhinged, you have to first trust yourself. It can feel scary because, in essence, you are showing up in the world as the most authentic version of yourself, which can feel extremely vulnerable.
The best way I get past this is: If someone doesn’t like me as the most authentic version of myself, then why would I want them to like me if I’m trying to play the part of perfect?
Once you re-prioritize how you want to be valued, it gets a lot easier to find the courage to be unhinged. You start showing up in ways that feel more grounded in your authenticity. And before you know it, people start resonating with you more often because of this.
The shift that everyone is sensing but no one is really talking about is that people are craving more real, raw, and honest interactions… not just in the content they consume, but in their day to day life. No one is attracted to perfection anymore.
We all practically live on our phones anyway, so when we actually come across someone who is fully present, imperfect, and unapologetically themselves, it feels refreshing. It feels human. It feels safe. In a world curated by filters, captions, and carefully constructed identities, authenticity stands out. People aren’t looking to be impressed anymore… they’re looking to feel something. They’re drawn to honesty, to vulnerability, to the courage it takes to show up without a mask. And that’s where being “unhinged” becomes your superpower: it gives others permission to drop the act too.
At the end of the day, being unhinged isn’t about rebelling for the sake of it… it’s about coming home to yourself. It’s about releasing the version of you that was shaped by expectations, timelines, and quiet self-betrayals, and choosing the one that feels alive, curious, and honest. The more you loosen your grip on how you’re perceived, the more magnetic you become. Not because you’re trying to be, but because you’re finally real.
So maybe this year isn’t about becoming more disciplined, more polished, or more “put together.” Maybe it’s about becoming more you. Letting your life unfold in ways that don’t always make sense on paper but feel right in your body. If that’s unhinged, then so be it.
-Reid
📹 Meanwhile on Youtube: 📹
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